Good evening my Corona friends. I am almost afraid to ask, but I hope you are all doing well. It took me about ten minutes to do the math here on how many days since my last post and I haven’t even had a cocktail yet, well maybe a small one. I finder harder and harder to process. I know we are under full siege right now and cases and deaths are rising faster than 9/11, but thankfully the vaccine is rolling out, and I am getting a fake ID so I can be one of the first in line. My roommate qualifies and I am thinking we can designate the loft to be an assisted living of sorts to get in on the first doses. I mean we are having meals delivered in a box, does that count?  Seriously whatever it takes. We are all looking forward to some reassurance that it is safe to go back in the water. Jaws has nothing on this pandemic. I watched the news yesterday and today as the first trucks rolled out and I said to Techie they are making a huge deal of the delivery of this vaccine, and he said Ya think?  Duh, yes it is the reason we are stuck inside and I can’t go to the gym, when I just making headway with my trainer Khalil, so embarrassing if I ever get back there now that I am a bundle of blubber. Oh, my first world problems.

Speaking of first-world problems have you been to the supermarket lately? Who are all these robot people running around the store with their I-phones and badges? It can be kind of creepy. I first noticed it around Thanksgiving when I made one of my reluctant trips to Whole Foods, but hey I live in the city and it’s one of the only places with parking. These guys were running around the store filling up their carts and they acted like they were on supermarket sweep, driving a Corvette or something. I was chill didn’t go off on them about hogging the space in front of the Bells’ Seasoning, doing whatever they do with their phone to be sure it is the right one, because it was crunch time for Thanksgiving, NAMASTE.  Now they have invaded all the markets and I really don’t like it. It is like a bumper car ride with my grocery cart.  They are probably rewarded for how Fast they can fill each cart but seriously stopping in front of all the tea bags and scanning so many till you get to the right herbal essence healing sexually satisfying tea for that client can be really annoying. I can wait a bit, maybe even a minute, but now I am going to accidentally bump you so move along. The sexually satisfying was just to see if you were paying attention, it wouldn’t be in the tea aisle but maybe the Astroglide one.  Anyway, you get the picture now these robots inspired by that evildoer Amazon have taken over even one of the only pleasures we can still do during Covid. Yes going to the grocery store is now officially an outing and we have to plan accordingly to have the most efficient and comfortable experiences, but these supermarket sweepers are really cramping my style. I am going to have to go back to senior hours, those little buggers better not be there at the same time. It’s funny that this whole conversation came up because I was telling my roommate how annoying it was for me with the robots, then my daughter who is a millennial remarked on it the other day, and then last night I read in one of my favorite blogs from the Retail Dr (shout out to Jill Biden) he’s not a real Dr., that it’s not a good thing for Whole Foods.

I vote we have designated Robot hours.

Just sayin…………..