DAY 524

Good evening my corona friends ad sad to say that we are well over 500 days into this Covid thing and now we are back to wearing a mask. It seems neither the chlorine bleach nor Ivermectin in any amount is going to make this virus go away. Seriously folks why would you rely on something you can buy at CVS or Tractor supply to cure Covid-19, and refuse the advice of epidemiologists whose job it is to study infectious diseases in humans, not horses or cows. It is really beyond the pale and just when I think it can’t get any weirder I saw Jordan Klepper interview a woman at a Trump rally who will never get vaccinated because she follows Dr. Tenpenny who believes that their bodies are becoming magnetized and forks and knives are sticking to their faces, that’s right she was testifying in the Ohio statehouse and you just can’t make this shit up. The truth is it would be great comedy if people didn’t believe it, and I am just going to say what a lot of people are thinking there are a whole lot of dumbasses in the world. I know we are supposed to be kind and listen to other points of view but in these instances and in also the Clorox and animal drugs, just plain stupid. We have a lot to worry about with the plague, fires, and wars, and now throw in a major hurricane, try and tell me that someone didn’t majorly piss off the big guy upstairs?

I never thought that forty years ago to the day when my roommate and I brought this tiny human into the world that we would be setting her for this craziness. The worst things we had to worry about were gas prices and mortgage rates, which by the way were extremely high by today’s standards, our first mortgage was 12% now they whine if it gets to 4%.  I tell you what I am sure we could live with those rates if you could make all that other shit go way. We have succeeded in abusing the planet for the next generations, but don’t worry climate change is not real, just ask a Republican? Unless he is not running for reelection.

August 31, 1981, just five minutes before midnight we welcomed our incredibly beautiful daughter into the world. Let me tell you things were a bit different then and this is when you wanted to go El Natural, meaning no drugs, I still think about how crazy were we with this crazy idea that we should go through labor and delivery with no drugs. I can remember being in that birthing room with techie and the Dr talking about sailing, while my contractions were coming fast and furious and what came out of my mouth when I told them in no uncertain terms, I don’t want to hear about it, in a very colorful manner.  The young resident took out a sandwich in the room that night and I screamed at him if he wasn’t sharing he better put it away.  I do feel bad about that, because I realized later that he was just exhausted and hungry, just like me, but not having a baby.  I don’t know what it is like today and wasn’t quite the same 4 years later when Max arrived but it was pretty cool having the “birthing room” where we could chill out and make our phone calls in the wee hours of the morning. We were some of the first in our friend group to have a baby so we had to share with everyone that night, imagine calling a friend at 2 am today when you get to be my age you have to double-check after 9 pm.  Our friend Donald won the night when he asked me “is it really like shitting a pumpkin?” I always wanted to ask someone that is what he said, and I said that pretty much sums it up. Of course, the second-best thing that happened to me that night after delivering Erica was getting wheeled into a room in the middle of the night that I would share with my new best friend, Nancy.  I don’t believe they have you share rooms today, at least if you have good insurance, but you are missing out.  Today they want the new dad in the room for the whole experience but ladies there is nothing better than having a roommate with a curtain between you and your conversations are on hemorrhoids and stitches.  Nancy’s baby girl came more than a month early that morning and lucky for the both of us,

Because we would never have met. I still remember Nancy pulling that curtain back in the early dawn and saying that is what you look like.  So as luck would have it, I not only came home with an absolutely incredible daughter but a friend for life, and yes the girls are great friends as well.

I can’t believe that I have a daughter who is turning forty, but more importantly, I can’t believe I have a daughter as incredible as Erica. Often I am in wonder how such a polite, sweet, and compassionate human is my daughter?  I know most people will say there is the roommate who had something to do with this person she has become and I will give him some credit. But I think she did it on her own with maybe a little sauciness from her mother, at least we know where she got her potty mouth from, yes not perfect.  

Erica my roommate and I are wishing you the most Glorious Birthday and we are so very proud of the incredible person and mother that you are today.  Charlie and Maisie are really going to need some guidance through this whacky world we live in today and they couldn’t have a better steward than you.  We love you Mucho!!!

Just saying…………………